I'm Kelsy. I'm a nurse. I work the night shift on a crazy surgical unit and you would not believe the stuff that happens when sick people sleep. To hear more about that and other stories read on....

Thursday, January 24, 2013

So I was changing this dressing...

The other day at work I was finishing report, when a Nurse practitioner I work with asked me for some help.  He said, "Has the patient in room 'whatever' had that much drainage all night?"  I said, "Well at the beginning of my shift there wasn't a lot, but it was oozing a bit."  He said, "Well, would you mind grabbing me when you go to change it?  I want to see the incision."  Okay, I can do that.
So when the time comes, right at the end of my shift, when I love to stay late to change dressings(insert sarcasm), I grab that NP and tell him I'm going to change the dressing.
We head into the patients room.  This patient was a nice little man, with a little bit of a mental deficit, but super kind and had a great sense of humor.  We got him up on this side so I could take the old dressing off and allow the NP to take a look at the incision.  The NP was being super helpful, which was totally a surprise as he is usually rude and bossy.  I took the dressing down and NP asked me to spread my fingers in a 'peace' sign and push down on either side of the incision to see what kind of oozing I could create.  Super cool, right?
So I push down with my fingers on either side of the patients incision, and right as I do so the patient lets out the longer, funniest FART of my life.  It felt like it lasted a lifetime.  
And then I died.  Laughing.
I was almost doubled over, with my hands still on the patient, laughing.  I know, super unprofessional. I just couldn't help it.  My patient's only response was "Oh sorry, I farted.  Did I poop?"  Nope.
NP's only response was, "I love when that happens first thing in the morning."
I died.  Literally.  I walked out to my car from work that shift and just died.  Of laughter.
It was worth staying late for.


lesley: the dream tree said...

haha, don't you just love when that happens.

Kelsey said...

I just read this story out loud to my parents and all three of us were laughing :) You are a great story teller!