A Little HOH

Disclaimer: This post is coming from a place of complete and utter acceptance that I too am a little HOH.  


HOH......."Hard of Hearing"


In the medical world, as I've given examples before, we have abbreviations for everything.  So today, we talk about, "HOH." 


Quite often I care for the elderly hard of hearing population.  Most often they have hearing aids, but by the time I come on shift they've removed them for the night and I must make do.  I resolve the issue by talking in a very deep voice very close to the ear, sometimes so close I may be mistaken for leaning in for a little smooth, to this I always make sure my head is turned so no one gets the wrong idea, because trust me, they might...
Off the subject a little bit, but a few weeks ago I actually did get a peck on the cheek by a very elderly gent who just felt my exceptional care deserved some action to which he leaned up quickly and pecked me on the jaw before I realized what he was up to.  Nevertheless, it made my day.  Sorry, I digress.
The key is making sure the patient can see your lips moving, yet this is hard to do when you are two inchs from their ear.  This is a very difficult and often frustrating communication barrier because while other patients are resting quietly, the HOH patient is yelling, talking quite loud, has the tv up to the highest volume, and when spoken to can never understand what in the world one is saying.
To this I have an example:
This patient was very HOH, yet never has owned a pair of hearing aids, he's just gotten by and by gotten by, I mean not at all.  Poor guy probably hasn't understood a full sentence in a long time.  To top it off he was quite a cranky sourpants and referred to me as "woman."  Instead of using his call bell to get my attention he yelled out, "yo!"  Of course I hurried into the room and said, "Can I get you something?" to which he responded, "We're gonna stop dating?"  Of course I may have let out a small giggle as I took in his confused and a bit let down look on his face.  How in the world did he think I was taking about dating?  At least he got the "ing" at the end of the sentence.  Hmm.  Not sure where that came from.  After listening to his, "WHAT?," "HUH?" and "Speak up, Woman" all night, my body language improved throughout the night, I must say.  Poor man never knew what in the world I was saying, but I must admit, I kind of loved him.  Even though he called me "Old Hag," "Woman," and "Sneaky" all night.
Oh, and when I was feeding him some soup for a midnight snack, I held the spoon in front of him, waiting for him to swallow, but he just opened his mouth and said, "Well, woman, let's have it."  When he asked what kind of soup it was I said, "vegetable beef," to which he said, "wheat?"  Yes, wheat soup.  Enjoy.